Little Miss

In 2011 I lost 4 of my best friends.

In 2011 I had my heart broken, more than once.

In 2011 I saw my tiny hometown get shaken by unexpected deaths of those we all knew and loved.

In 2011 I became a coward, a person fearful of the world around her.

In 2011 I built my walls even higher, and shut out everyone around me.

In 2011 I turned to self harm, and began cutting myself, losing hope in people and everything around me.

In 2011 I lost control.

But...

In 2011 I became closer with other friends and roommates, and have an incredibly deep connection with one.

In 2011 I fixed my broken heart, more than once.

In 2011 I saw my hometown grow stronger than ever, unite, and stand by each other through the tragedies.

In 2011 I've tried to break away from that fear, succeeding on occasion.

In 2011 I learned who I can trust, and as a result have protected myself.

In 2011 I realized how much I love my family, and how I am the luckiest girl in the world to have the most supportive and loving parents.

And in 2012...

I will stop cutting myself. I will take back control of my life. I will guard myself from heartache but remember to be kind to those around me and not shut everyone out. I will step out of my comfort zone more and try to have more fun. I will avoid locking myself in my room and shutting out the world when it gets hard. I will be more appreciative of my life and the many, many ways it has been blessed. I will remember those who are no longer with us, and forgive those who left me on purpose. I will strive for inner peace. I will go back to being a person I am proud of, and not use my weaknesses as excuses. I will continue being a fighter.

Here's to a new year, a new start, and a new life.